1 FACT THAT IS DIFFICULT TO ACCEPT

...as of yesterday evening, Junichi is now a father.

Baby and mom are doing great!

--O.W.

A SONG FOR OURSELVES PREMIER THIS SAT

Back in 1997, I had the distinct honor of working on a reunion concert for A Grain of Sand, arguably the first self-identified Asian American musical group, a folk trio that originally formed in the early 1970s between Nobuko Miyamoto, William "Charlie" Chin and Chris Iijima.

A Grain of Sand were important beyond just their historical stature - having come out of the Asian American Movement of the late 1960s, the group were tackling any number of critical - and complex - social and racial issues through their music at a time where Asian Americans were still largely invisible in popular media and culture.

All three members went on to continue their careers in the arts and music, especially Chris Iijima who put another album in 1982 with Chin called Back to Back (he was also a law professor outside of his musical life).

Sadly, Chris passed away a little over three years ago, on 12/31/05. A new documentary by Tad Nakamura pays tribute to his life and legacy and it will be premiered in Los Angeles this upcoming Saturday night. I've seen the film and it was wonderful - extremely well-made and powerful in its message and the history is covers.

Accompanying the film will be appearances by Nobuko and Charlie, as well as performances by the Blue Scholars, Kiwi and Bambu. You can find more info on the film here.

Also, DJ Phatrick, formerly DJ for Native Gunz (now hosting the weekly Devil's PIe party), has put together a mixtape in honor of the film's premier: A Song For Ourselves Mixtape which features songs from all of the above artists noted in this post.


Here's one of my favorite songs by Chris, from Back to Back called "Asian Song."

Chris Iijima: Asian Song
From Back to Back (East/West World Records, 1982)

--O.W.

WHO'S THE ANGRY ONE NOW?

not looking so angry to me

So after excoriating Angry Asian Man for daring to designate me - the happy-go-lucky partner in Poplicks - as an Angry Reader, Junichi is the latest Angry Dood. (AAM claims the choice of Junichi was, by no means, a result of Junichi's ranty-rantiness. No word on whether Junichi was asked to fund-raise on behalf of AAM however).

Things we learn from Junichi's post (that we didn't already know):

*He's really, really, really close to becoming a father.
*He has beef with wedding DJs.
*He is the funniest lawyer in San Diego (is there a lot of competition for this title?)
*He harbors a deep hatred for Paris. Hilton, that is.
*He wants Counting Crows boxsets as a baby shower gift.

---

Junichi adds:

For some reason, Angry Asian Man did not use this photo, which I submitted to him and preferred:

--O.W.

SENTENCING MATH

3 clubs, 25 years, and No Cruel and Unusual Punishment

Gary Ewing stole three golf clubs worth $399 each and was sentenced to 25 years to life in a California prison. The Supreme Court upheld the constitutionality of his sentence in 2003.

The total value of the clubs that Ewing stuffed into his pants was $1,197.

Let us assume that Williams gets the low end of his sentence: 25 years.

Let's further assume that one's punishment for theft is proportionally related to the value of the stolen property.

If theft of $1,197 = 25 years, then Sir Robert Allen Stanford (who allegedly bilked investors of $8 billion) should be sentenced to 167,084,377.6 years in prison.

Similarly, Bernie Madoff (who allegedly engaged in a $50 billion Ponzi scheme) should be sentenced to 1,044,277,360 years in prison.

You're welcome, judges

--Junichi

TOP 10 NICKNAMES OTHER THAN "A-ROID" THAT WILL SURFACE AFTER EVERYONE ADMITS TO STEROID USE

Alex Rodriguez actually misses when he was just "A-Hole"

Top 10 Nicknames Other Than "A-Roid" That Will Surface After Allegations of Steroid Use are Brought to Light:

1. Roid Blagojevich


2. Hannah Montanabolic Steroids


3. H.G.H. Wells


4. Asterisk Astley


5. Balco-fi Annan


6. Juiced Newton


7. Zac Efroid


8. Celene Androsteredion


9. Human Growth Hormona Lisa


10. Nastia Liukinjection

--Junichi

QUESTION OF THE WEEK #140

I made up my mind: I'm keeping my baby.

This Week's Question:

If you were listening to your iPod while in labor, what songs would you want to hear while attempting to push out a baby?

--Junichi

GUESS WHO BEAT ME TO FATHERHOOD?

I beat you, Semitsu!

If you guessed 13-year-old Alfie Patten, then you are correct!

Sure, Mr. Patten was born right about the same time I graduated from college. But he obviously didn't need the two decades that I did to figure out the birds and the bees.

Alfie, maybe we can have play dates together! Your baby girl and my baby boy (who should be arriving any second now) will only be a few weeks apart, at most.

Plus, when they both go down for a nap, I can help you with your multiplication tables, while you help me feel as old as Larry King.

--Junichi

ANOTHER 20 FACTS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO ACCEPT

This baby is no longer available for full-frontal nude photography

1. The infant on the cover of Nirvana's Nevermind album is now 17 years old.


2. Over three months later, the state of Minnesota is still unable to determine who won the senate race.


3. A large Chocolate Oreo® Shake at Baskin Robbins is 2600 calories, 1220 of which are calories from fat.


4. A Chinese man made a woman deaf in one ear when he kissed her.


5. The winning bid to own the number 867-5309 (popularized by Tommy Tutone) in NYC was $186,853.09.


6. The name of the 18-year-old intern that openly gay Portland mayor Sam Adams had an affair with is actually Beau Breedlove.


7. Alison Krauss is now only one win away from having just as many Grammy Awards as Quincy Jones.


8. A Russian remake of the TV show Married With Children is so popular that Sony, the producer of the show, hired back the original writers to produce new scripts for Russia.


9. Ex-President Bush pardoned rapper John Forte, who was midway through a 14-year sentence for transporting a suitcase filled with $1.4 million dollars in liquid cocaine.


10. A Hawaiian Tropic Zone restaurant in New York City allegedly will not hire people unless they "talk white."


11. Joe the Plumber admitted that McCain "appalled" him and made him "feel dirty."


12. John Wayne once won the dog Lassie from its owner in a poker game.


13. This year, the number of people the Pentagon is employing solely for recruiting, advertising and PR purposes is 27,000, which is almost as big as the entire 30,000-person work force in the State Department.


14. Stevie Wonder produced Minnie Riperton's ballad "Lovin' You."


15. Former Vice President Dick Cheney had an uncredited cameo in Die Hard: With a Vengeance


16. South Korea, Taiwan, Austria, and Switzerland all have laws criminalizing adultery.


17. "Cwm" is a three-letter word in the Scrabble dictionary. (A cwm is apparently a circular basin with steep walls.)


18. eHarmony finally decided to provide its match-aking services to gays and lesbians ... not out of financial self-interest, but because it was forced to do so in a lawsuit.


19. The city of Birmingham (the one in the U.K.) has decided to drop all apostrophes from its street signs.


20. Some Japanese people snack on blowfish testicles, despite the fact that it could kill you if prepared incorrectly.

--Junichi

NOW PUT YOUR HANDS UP

the parody that was actually an homage

Vibe's Terrance Dean writes a fascinating and informative story on the history of J-Setting which Beyonce took global in her "Single Ladies" video. A shorter version appears online, complete with youtube videos. What began in Southern Black colleges amongst drill teams then crossed into the gay club scene and from there, it caught the attention of Beyonce's choreographer (and a gazillion online parody-ers).

Here's one of the original Jackson State J-Settes (né Jaycettes), dancing to "P.Y.T.":

--O.W.

TO ALL OUR READERS IN MELBOURNE

Stay safe. Our best wishes and condolences are with you.

--O.W.

PANEL ON "MUSICS OF FILIPINO AMERICA"

they look kind of visibl to me
February 5 and 6, Thursday and Friday, 2009
Tropical Renditions: Musics of Filipino America

This historic two-day conference features musical artists and musics produced in Filipino America, an imaginative and social sphere created by a history of contacts and convergences between two nations-the Philippines and U.S.- across the Pacific. Bringing together musicians and scholars of traditional and contemporary Philippine and American musical forms, this gathering will present glances of music composed and musical artists living in the Philippines, U.S., and other parts of the diaspora.

The concert and symposium will feature performances by Filipino jazz, hip hop and electronica musical artists as well as scholarly work that examines histories of cross-cultural music-making (1960s Latin soul), space and musical subculture (1990s hip hop in Los Angeles), traditional cultures (kulintang performance), and the figure of the Filipina/o in U.S. popular musical imaginaries (early 1900s military songs).

Participants include: Lakandiwa de Leon (co-producer of Beats, Rhymes, and Resistance); Theo Gonzalves (University of Hawaii, Manoa); Kuttin Kandi (legendary DJ, 5th Platoon & Anomolies) Maria Katindig-Dykes (legendary jazz vocalist); Ron Quesada (Kulintronica); Mary Talusan (Tufts University); Karen Tongson (University of Southern California); and Oliver Wang (California State University, Long Beach)

CONCERT: February 5, Thursday, 8:00 P.M.
Featuring musical performances by Maria Katindig-Dykes, Ron Quesada (Kulintronica), and Kuttin Kandi
Performance Lab, ARTS 166
Free and open to the public
Parking: $5 in Lot 1 (No fee with UC permit)

SYMPOSIUM: February 6, Friday, 1:00-5:00 P.M.
CHASS Interdisciplinary Building - South, room 1113
Free and open to the public
Parking: Permits available at the Information Kiosk

--O.W.

THIS ANGRY ASIAN MAN IS INCENSED BY ANGRYASIANMAN CHOOSING THE LESS ANGRY ASIAN MAN AS THE ANGRY READER OF THE WEEK

It's on

Oliver has been chosen as the "Angry Reader of the Week" over at AngryAsianMan, which makes me very angry.

I take my being snubbed as a royal insult. Every loyal reader here knows that I am filled with so much more rage than O-Dub, who has become unabashedly content after scoring a tenure-track teaching job, raising an adorable daughter, and receiving buku Benjamins in consulting fees as the Oriental Outreach Coordinator for the Republican Party.

In fact, I'm so angry right now at AngryAsianMan that I'm thinking of starting a new website called AngrierAsianMan to channel my signature yellow-on-yellow beef.

I encourage you to visit AngryAsianMan's website -- the Panda Express of Asian blogs -- before he eventually takes it down in shame.

--Junichi

A COMPELLING MEA CULPA

These three videos document an attempt by David Letterman to right a wrong.

In 1993, comedian Bill Hicks performed a stand-up routine that Letterman had edited out of The Late Show because he presumably deemed the material too edgy. Even though the material had been approved by censors, his routine became the first to be cut in its entirety, prompting Hicks to write a 39-page letter of outrage to the New Yorker.

Last Friday, over fifteen years later, Dave invited Hicks' mother to be a guest on the show to apologize and finally air the lost segment.

It's fascinating to finally see what was deemed "too edgy" in 1993 and ponder whether it's any less edgy by today's networks' late night standards. Even though the references are dated, the material reminds me that Bill Hicks is one of the few comedians who actually deserves the label "ahead of his time."

Of course, his short set goes nowhere near the dark and profoundly philosophical areas of his hour-long routines that have been released on CD (long after he died).

In any event, I'm glad it aired.

Bill Hicks is undeniably one of my favorite stand-up comedians. Like many others, I discovered him after he already passed away. I'll never look at Gideon bibles, the "This is your brain on drugs" commercials, and dinosaurs the same way.

For me, it's especially suckful that Bill died in 1994, right when the "Contract with America," the conservative revolution, and the rise of the religious right just started to dominate the American landscape.


Credit: Popwatch

--Junichi