REVENGE OF THE OTAKU

Maid in Manhattan Tokyo

The AP recently reported on the growing popularity and numbers of the Japanese "otaku," which can be roughly translated as "geek" or "nerd." (My relatives call me Otaku, however, because, they tell me, it also means "hella cool.")

Long considered misfits, the sterotypical otaku are overweight, unshaven, bespectacled men who play with computers and obsessively fantasize about anime girls. They've existed for years, but now, they are becoming more socially accepted in Japan.

Indeed, there is a growing interest among some Japanese women for these otaku, who already have fanatical fetishes themselves, further solidfying the fact that the Japanese are the weirdest people in the universe.

The rise of the otaku can be attributed to the popularity of a Japanese book, film, and TV series called Train Man, which chronicles the budding romance between a beautiful woman and the nerd she met on a train. Apparently, Train Man did for Japanese geeks what Rain Man did for the autistic. Sort of. Ok, not really.

While I appreciate any appreciation of nerds and nerd culture, it's hard for me to applaud any group whose manga fanaticism and sexual fetishes are one and the same.

I mean, don't get me wrong, Luann is hot, but I've never fantastized about her (except for that one time I did a kegstand with a bottle of Nyquil).

Whereas this Japanese man apparently lives with a lifesize doll of his favorite anime character.

The emergence and growth of the otaku also explains the rise of "Maid Cafes" in the Akihabara district of Japan, a growing mecca of otaku culture. At these cafes, young cartoonish 20-something women dress as maids and serve customers with greetings like "Welcome home, Master." The inspiration? Right here ...

At one of these Maid Cafes, customers can apparently follow up a meal with grooming services that include -- wait for it -- ear cleanings. (Take note, Olive Garden!)

If you ask me, the otaku sound "hentai," or perverted.

And for those looking for a handy guide to Japanese slang terminology, you're welcome.

--Junichi