Poplicks.com: THE LATEST INVENTIONS

Best Fisting Toy of 2005

For those not hip to the most recent tech innovations and scientific breakthroughs, Poplicks is here to sort out the latest and greatest ...

FANTASTIC 4 ELECTRONIC "THING" HANDS - Just when you thought that lawsuits eliminated all the good toys, Toy Biz has released "The Thing" hands (pictured above). The warning on the toy says it all: "Do not strike any person, pet or inanimate object with Thing Hands as serious injury could result." Basically, these fists of steel are the uber-effective way to beat your baby brother senseless until he becomes braindead ... while imitating your favorite Fantastic Four character! Not surprisingly, these clobbering killer fists made the list of Most Dangerous Toys of 2005.

LIQUID CONDOMS: China just started selling the first ever liquid condom-in-a-can. This antiseptic foam spray "forms a physical membrane inside the vagina, protecting it from infection, acting as a barrier to pregnancy and providing a lubricating effect." The device also claims to kill gynecological disease pathogens such as "staphylococcus aureus, Candida, coliform bacillus." Amazing! I usually have to use three different foam sprays to get rid of the staphylococcus aureus, Candida, and coliform bacillus in my hoohah!

PEZ MP3 PLAYER - If you're cool like me and you collect Pez Dispensers, and you also enjoy music-playing gadgets, then these MP3-playing Pez dispensers are the mother of all your sheet-staining fantasies. (With thanks to Michelle T.)

AIRLINE SECURITY LIE DETECTORS: The Israelis have invented the GK-1 voice analyzer, a new walk-through airport lie detector that requires passengers to answer questions about whether they are planning something illicit. Scary. If the software detects tremors in your voice as you answer, you will probably be instantly strip searched by a robot Ariel Sharon. Guess what Big Brother is getting for Christmas!

GUMMY BEAR BREAST IMPLANTS - The company Silimed is making "gummy bear" breast implants that it hopes to get approved in the U.S. As if breast implants aren't hazardous enough, now you're challenged to trust a company named Silimed (pronounced: Silly-Med) that makes gummy knockers. The "gummy bear" nickname originates from the gummy-like consistency of the gel inside the implant, as well as how fun it is to chew off an implant's head and stick it onto the body of a different colored implant.

POOH ON TOAST! Finally, if you are sick of the incessant Virgin Mary images on your bread, you can switch it up with an image of Winnie the Pooh or Tigger imprinted on your toast. He may not be a holy impression of the sacred virgin mother of Jesus, but Pooh is mighty fun to smear with butter before eating!