THE NAKED TRUTH ABOUT CARROT TOP
Why nobody dials down the middle
True story: A few years ago, after a good run at the blackjack tables and nine too many complementary virgin margaritas in Vegas, I decided to take a break and pay the exorbitant $20 one-time fee to use the Treasure Island gym/spa.
Upon completing a grueling cardio workout during which I burned at least 37 calories, I went to rest in the lounge of the men's locker room. I plopped down my sweaty eczema-laced butt on a plush couch, watched TV, and began to consume what would eventually add up to 2000 calories worth of complementary juices and pretzles.
In the middle of my hour-long cool-down, comedian Carrot Top, donned in one of the spa robes, walked past me to enter the men's sauna. At first, I was unsure it was actually him, but there was no confusing his pockmarked face and the aura of his C-list celebrity status. I also recalled that Carrot Top was scheduled to perform at the MGM Grand that weekend.
15 minutes and 3 bowls of pretzles later, I was still resting on the couch. Carrot Top came out of the sauna and walked by me again.
But this time, he was buck nekkid.
And yes, I saw Carrot Bottom.
This is a story that my grandchildren will certainly be telling their grandchildren.
<< Home