DID KEN LAY COMMIT SUICIDE?

The Final Lay-off

I hate to sound like one of the nuts in the blogosphere, spouting off unsubstantiated Ken Lay conspiracy theories devoid of merit or validity. (See image above.)

But at the risk of being dismissed as insane in the membrane, I do believe there is a serious possibility that Ken Lay committed suicide.

Consider the following: In Texas, when a defendant croaks before he has had a chance to appeal, his conviction gets wiped from the books. (For those who expect proper legal citation, see United States v. Estate of Parsons, 367 F.3d 409, 413 (5th Cir. 2004).) Lay was a well-informed man and probably knew about this rule, known as the abatement doctrine.

Since Lay died before his sentencing and before he could appeal, he, therefore, died an innocent man.

Indeed, even though he was found "hella guilty" (legal term of art) and the chances of his conviction being overturned were "hella slim" (more legal jargon, sorry), the law treats him as if he was never charged or convicted of anything.

Consequently, Enron prosecutors won't be able to collect the $43.5 million of his personal assets that it sought in forfeiture claims filed last week. Instead, Mrs. Lay, whose first name may or may not be Frito, gets to keep it.

So now put yourself in the Lay-man's shoes:

1. You are a 64-year-old facing a long prison sentence with little chance of winning an appeal.
2. Your name will be forever associated with corporate fraud and none of your friends want to be associated or seen with you.
3. The government will soon wipe out your personal fortune by seizing $43.5 million of your personal assets through forfeiture hearings. And both the government and civil litigants are hoping to take your home and other assets too.
   
4. If you die now, on the other hand, you have a chance to ensure that the $43.5 million in assets stays with your family -- ensuring that they never have to lift a finger for the rest of their lives.
5. If you die now, civil litigants will also have a much harder chance touching those assets, because there is no conviction. Moreover, they can't get punitive damages against dead defendants.
6. If you die now, nobody can take your $1.5 million luxury apartment under the Homestead Act so long as your wife, the widow, is the primary occupant.
   
7. You already have coronary heart problems, which would cause nobody to be suspicious if you "suddenly" died from an induced heart attack.

Given all that, wouldn't you kill yourself?

Of course, just because Ken Lay had every motive and incentive to kill himself doesn't mean he did it.

But if he did, the former Enron CEO just left this world with the last laugh, surpassing the dastardly deeds of all villains, real or otherwise.

Ken Lay. He may be evil, but he's good.

--Junichi